Monday, April 23, 2012

Giving "The Girl Talk"

I never imagined that I would be giving my 6 year old "the girl talk"... well, at 6 years old.  Don't boys mature slower than girls?  Don't boys think girls have cooties until they hit puberty?  That was my plan... to have many years to figure out what to say then... not now.

But last night... Wait, I am getting ahead of myself.  Let me start from the beginning.

Remember my last post about Sam and his little cousin?  If not, you can read it here.  It didn't bother me a smidgen because they are kids and the whole thing is/was totally innocent, to say the least.  Then yesterday, only a week since Sam saw his cousin, we went to our new ward (church in our new area).  Our new neighbors came and sat behind us during the first meeting and Sam causally flirted with their two girls (One is a little older and one is a little bit younger than he is.  And both are darling!).  After I dropped the two older boys off at Primary while baby boy and I went to the adult classes. Ben was a drill this weekend so I braved the new ward on my own (and feeling very pleased with myself for being so brave).

After the meets were over, I went to pick up the Tweedles from the primary.  Nephi comes out all happy that he met some new friends (although, he informed me, that 2 of new friends were naughty).  Then Sam comes out holding the hand of the oldest neighbor girl.  Wow, that boy moves fast... They were followed by a bevy of giggling girls.  Sam new girl was saying stuff like, "Look!  He wants to hold my hand!" All the adults were exchanging odd looks, and I just wanted to say, "Oh good grief, he's only six!  Grow up!"

When her mom came over and detached her from Sam, Sam blew her kiss... which REALLY got the girls going!  It was freaking hilarious! Maybe it is because I know my boy so well, that I know how innocent it really is.  We are a very loving family.  We give lots of hugs, hold hands, and we blow kisses to grandma, grandpa and each other... no big deal.  I guess lots of other families aren't so loving.  The fact that Sam knows how to treat girls nice, is also a reflection on how Ben treats me... the boys are always watching us.  And to me, it's awesome that Sam is so kind to girls instead of pulling their hair and calling them names.

Then last night, our neighbors invited us over for a BBQ.  So we took the boys over and had a great visit and a lot of fun.  When we first got there, the two little girls were a buzz!  The younger was chanting for Sam to kiss her sister and the sister was giggling and telling him he better not dare!  (Which really meant that she wanted him too, but to save face she would pretend that she didn't.) What do you think Sam did?  Absolutely nothing.  He had no idea what they were talking about and ignored the flirty dancing around.  Instead he was totally focused on their toys and slide... typical guy... distracted by toys.  I don't think they ever grow out of that.

I think they were only a little disappointed... but determined that he was deeper than he comes off as and maybe is playing hard to get.  Which we all know that boys that age (sometimes even adults) never think that deep.

Last night Sam came into my room and told me that he was really happy because he had a girlfriend at grandma's house AND he has a girlfriend here.  "I have TWO girlfriends now, Mom!!" he informed me happily.  I put my arm around him and sighed.  I could not believe I was about to have this discussion with my 6 year old.

"Sam, that's all fun and nice.  But I have to give you a rule, now."

"What Mom?"

"No kissing girls until you're 16 okay?"

"What?  Can I blow kisses?"

"Yes, you can blow kisses, but no kissing on cheeks or lips. Okay?"

"Can I kiss their hands?"

"Ummm.... yeah, that's probably okay...."

"Awesome.  Mom, I really, REALLY like girls," he told me.

"You're father would be proud..." I couldn't help but say.  Then I wanted to see how much he understood.  "So Sam, what is the new rule?"

"No kissing girls on the face until I am 16!"

"Good.  How old are you now?"

"I am six!"

"How many years until you can kiss girls?"  He thought about it for a minute and then said, "Ten?"

"That's right!"  Big hugs ensued and I was a satisfied mom.  But I feel that there is another discussion coming up soon... you know the one about being careful where you touch a girl.  If he is going to be playing around them, he has to know, right? I probably would have had this talk sooner, but it just hasn't come up.

Meanwhile, I have a plan that might hold the girls off a little... the summer buzzes...

Man, I love being the mom of boys!


PS: Then on second thought, they still look pretty darn cute....

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