Saturday, April 3, 2010

Of Mouse and Man

Since before I came home from my training, Cat had been telling me of an intruder in our home. It would come out at night and raid the kitchen, leaving unwanted treasures behind for us to clean up. She lived in fear that it would let itself be seen or leave behind a disease for us to contract.

Being a man of large stature, and knowing well my duties to my family, I reasured her that wen I came home from training I would take care of the uninvited guest and restore peace in the kingdom.

A short time later I returned home and promptly took to my duties.

Having been trained to kill, but reluctant to do so unless absolutely necessary, I purchased a nonlethal trap telling myself I would let it go in the graveyard close to our house.

I set up the trap day after day in areas I deemed most likely that the intruder would pass. This eventually became a game of Man versus Mouse, the mouse doing whatever it pleased leaving a trail of turds for me to follow. After some time I decided to not only lay the trap but force a path for the mouse to follow. This had immediate results, however not the results I was expecting.

The next time I checked my little nonlethal trap I found a strategically placed turd right on top of it. Talk about spitting in your face. I was finished with our little game ... now it was personal. He insulted my intelligence. I promptly went and bought a very lethal alternative.

Needless to say, I lost many battles, but I won the war!

Our home is now free of pint-size intruders who as it turns out was herrassing the neighbors as well by violating their fruit bowl.

The moral of the story... Don't challenge a lesser to a duel. Any loss will eat at your ego no matter great the victory.

Checkmate.

Ben

1 comment:

Jill said...

Ick. I hate mice. You go! Way to protect your family from the vermin. :)