Yesterday was Sunday. We go to church on Sunday. Church for us is 3 hours (1 hour of sacrament meeting, and 2 hours of Sunday school and other classes). I had nightmares for 2 weeks after Ben left about everything that could go wrong with me and the boys without him there for the following reasons:
1. Sammy is a very fast runner. I am not.
2. The boys like to bicker. LOUDLY.
3. Tantrums are a common occurrence no matter where we may be.
4. Did I mention that Sammy is a fast runner?
This morning when I got up, I knew Ben was going to call. I just had this feeling! So I practically showered with my phone just in case. I carried it tucked in my bra, no pockets in my skirt, all morning... you never know...
But for some reason I put it on top of the TV while I was changing the boys into their Sunday best... which was what ever clothes were still clean from the week. Then I noticed that I couldn't find any pants for Nephi. I will just slip out and check in the dryer. Did I ever tell you our dryer is outside on the balcony? Oh, the joys of student housing! So I unlocked the back door, made sure I wouldn't get locked out, and slipped out to check the dryer. I grabbed the pants and made for the door before the boys noticed and tried to come out to play.
I tried again.
That little turd! Sammy had locked the door while I was outside! I knocked on the door.
"Sam open the door!" I called out. I knocked again. "SAM OPEN THE DOOR!"
I heard laughing. I looked to my right where the living room window was. Two little faces were pressed against the pane wearing big smiles. "Open the door, Sam!" They laughed. My anger was fueled. Then Sammy held up his hand. I gasp and I started to panic. He was holding my cell phone! The one I just knew Ben was going to call me on. He was going to call and I was going to miss it!!!!
"OPEN THE DOOR!!!" I kept pounding and pounding. The boys just laughed more. I just about lost it and started to cry when I had an idea. A brilliant idea. I slowly cupped my hand and pretended like I was eating a treat. The boys stopped laughing.
"Oh, this treat is soooooo yummy!!!" I said loudly for them to hear. It took approximately 2.2 seconds for Sam to get to the door and open it. I stormed in and he knew he was going to get it by the look on my face... I just didn't know what "it" he was going to get, but whatever "it" was "it" was going to be big!
Then the phone clutched in Sammy's hot little hand started to ring Ben's song.
Saved by the ring, little guy... but next time... well, there had just not better be a next time!
Now, I should have known that the day was cursed, and I should just go back to bed. But being the responsible parent I try to be, I finally got the kids into the car (after a great talk with Ben) and off we went to church.
Even though we were late, we still found a small pew all to ourselves. Which is the best. I hate bothering other people with my kids. As soon as we sat down, the boys started fishing around in my church bag and pulling out the Tupperware of treats, Thomas the Trains and his friends, a random bus, coloring books, and a used sucker from 2 weeks ago, which Nephi was more than happy to finish off.
All was going well, until Sam didn't like the fact that Nephi was playing with the bus. So he tried to trade him with a train. He wasn't going for that, he never does, and Sam started screaming. Then he grabbed the bus and Nephi started screaming. I took the bus away. They both started screaming in unison. Sam got so mad he threw his Thomas train and pegged the old lady sitting in front of us in the back of the head.
While I was busy apologizing, Sammy snuck the bus. Nephi tattled by yelling, "No Sammy! Naughty!" I took it away again making Sam pound his fist down on the coloring book -- which wouldn't have been too bad if the Tupperware full of cheerios wasn't balancing precariously on one end. The cereal went flying! And I am talking 12 feet up and 6 feet around. I was so embarrassed as I tried to pick the cheerios out of the old lady's hair in front of us. She had one of those poofy hair styles they have done every week at the salon and the cheerios gravitated towards its Velcro-like attributes.
I don't think she likes me now. And she really doesn't like my boys. But all in all, she was a good sport about it...
It only got worse when Sam stepped on the cereal I was trying to clean up, and Nephi escaped the pew and took off down the isle heading for the front. I don't remember what happened next it was all so fast, but somehow I managed to chase him down, and get him back into the pew before Sam realized what was going on.
I had sweat pouring down my face, and I wanted to cry. I missed Ben. I needed him.
Then my savior came in the form of a teenaged pink-haired girl armed with an activity book and pencil, which totally captivated Sam, and came and sat with us. Nephi was so freaked out he wouldn't move. He just sat on the pew looking at his lap, shooting the girl with occasional crusty looks. Hey, at least he was being quiet.
They were perfect for the rest of the time. I felt happy and relieved, and I hope next week is better! Do you think she will sit with us again?